He Has A Girlfriend, However Why Does He Need You? What’s Up With That?

So you are feeling a reference to a man in your life.
You two have the perfect conversations, there’s apparent chemistry, and also you assume the 2 of you may make an excellent couple.
Then he drops the bombshell: he has a girlfriend.
Your coronary heart sinks, and your desires of being collectively fade away.
You surprise why he acted so romantically with you if there was no probability of a future.
Understanding what to do on this scenario might be difficult, particularly if he’s nonetheless pursuing you and making strikes.
Fortunately, there are widespread the explanation why a man may let you know he has a girlfriend, and these may help you resolve how you can transfer ahead within the relationship.
So let’s dive into the chances of why a man may chase you when he’s not single in an effort to make sense of the scenario.
Can A Man Like You Even If He Has a Girlfriend?
It’s fairly potential a man can such as you and nonetheless have a girlfriend.
It’s not one thing we often deal with, particularly in monogamous relationships, however folks usually have emotions (starting from fleeting to long-lasting) for somebody aside from their accomplice.
There are numerous completely different outcomes of a state of affairs like this:
- He entertains the concept as a fantasy and lets it go
- His attraction continues to develop, and he retains it quiet
- He discusses the scenario along with his girlfriend/a therapist/a trusted supply to truthfully work via his emotions
- He lets you know the way he feels in confidence however doesn’t wish to act on it
- He desires to pursue one thing with you whereas nonetheless being along with his present girlfriend
- He leaves his accomplice and continues to pursue you
It may be arduous to foretell the end result of this case. Males are inclined to cope with their attraction to a different lady primarily based on their social conditioning and previous patterns.
For instance, if a person has been cheated on previously, he could justify hiding his emotions for others from his accomplice as a result of he’s terrified of the identical factor occurring to him once more.
The best way to Inform If a Man Likes You When He Has a Girlfriend
There are some widespread indicators when deciphering if an hooked up man likes you. They aren’t too far off from the indicators we see in a single man, but it surely’s necessary to pay attention to the extra context right here.
Listed here are some clues which will recommend he has emotions for you:
- He acts in another way round you than different folks
- He compliments you usually
- He goes out of his approach that can assist you
- He asks you out on dates
- He tries to spend time with you when he’s accessible
- He pays consideration and remembers belongings you inform him
- His physique language is suggestive of attraction
- He talks about his relationship with you
These indicators might be purely platonic.
However in the event you’re noticing many of those indicators directly, then it’s solely potential he has a crush on you.
If He Has a Girlfriend, Why Does He Need Me? 15 Robust Causes to Take into account
1. There’s an Plain Chemistry
Generally it’s arduous to place a finger on it – we simply really feel like we wish to be round that particular person. It might really feel prefer it’s past our management. A person could really feel an irresistible pull to be round you, even when it’s not logical in any respect.
You’ll discover him standing subsequent to you in social conditions, reaching out commonly, and perhaps even gazing at you when he thinks you’re not wanting.
2. He’s Unhappy with His Companion
Simply because he’s in a relationship doesn’t imply it’s assembly his wants or satisfying him.
Whether or not he feels uncared for, unheard, or taken without any consideration, he’s looking for your validation and emotional assist. On this approach, you’re filling the gaps in his present relationship.
3. He’s Avoiding Dedication
Discovering a accomplice prepared and in a position to decide to a relationship totally isn’t any small feat. So it’s not stunning that many males get chilly ft after they begin getting critical in a relationship.
Getting involved in another person helps to deflect from the dedication he’s been avoiding.
He could benefit from the easiness of flirting with you over making arduous selections, similar to if he’s going to maneuver in along with his accomplice or calm down with youngsters.
4. He Has Low Confidence and Self-Esteem
If a person has low-self esteem in his relationship, he could search this from others. It might be as a result of his present accomplice doesn’t commonly make him really feel valued or cherished.
However it might additionally don’t have anything to do together with her and will end result from a deep inside wrestle about his worthiness.
For those who discover a man is fishing for compliments and always looking for consideration when he’s with you, this can be a main cause for his flirtatious conduct.
5. You’ve Each Shaped a Robust Emotional Bond
Possibly you and this man have gone via one thing collectively, similar to reaching a serious life milestone, working intensely on a venture collectively, and even experiencing a tragedy, such because the lack of an in depth pal.
Sure experiences can create an intense emotional bond between two folks, and he could not be capable to assist however really feel drawn to you.
6. There’s A Lot of Bodily Pressure and Attraction
In the case of being the best bodily “sort” and having a powerful attraction, we are able to’t all the time management our emotions.
For those who completely match the invoice for what he finds engaging and there’s loads of bodily chemistry, it may be arduous to withstand.

You two may have been in conditions that brought on loads of bodily contact – as an illustration, lengthy hugs, dance nights, and so on. These situations may end up in an intense bodily bond and need for sexual connection.
7. He’s Bored In His Present Relationship
Stability is important in a relationship, however an excessive amount of can result in stagnation and tedium.
If he’s been with the identical particular person for some time and so they’ve been caught in the identical patterns, it is sensible why he could also be tempted by somebody new.
If that is so, you’re probably very completely different from his present accomplice. You might do issues that he needs his present girlfriend would. As an alternative of bringing life into his current relationship, he’s exploring it with you.
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8. Communication Is Missing in His Present Relationship
Communication is the muse of a wholesome relationship. If he’s not getting sufficient from his present accomplice, then it is sensible why he could also be drawn to you for dialog and connection.
You might hear him vent to you about numerous relationship points, which exhibits that he doesn’t have the area to work them out along with his girlfriend.
9. He’s Jealous Of His Companion
Possibly this man’s girlfriend is drawn to different folks, and he can’t assist however really feel jealous. This might make him really feel insecure or like his relationship is threatened.
He could flip to you for consideration in order that he can increase his personal shallowness. That is extra about utilizing you to make him really feel higher than being genuinely involved in you.
10. He Does It Simply As a result of He Can
It sounds harsh, however typically an opportunistic man will flirt with you just because he can get away with it. It’s all about pushing boundaries for this man, and it’s a giant energy play for him.
Morals don’t come into query, and he merely goals to “win” the scenario as if it have been a sport.
When a man tells you he has a girlfriend, doesn’t categorical any regret or emotions of guilt, and nonetheless continues to flirt with you, it is a fairly clear signal that he’s doing it simply to benefit from you and his girlfriend.
11. He’s Not Appropriate With His Companion
Even when this man loves his girlfriend, it might be potential that she’s not the best match for him.
He will not be sexually drawn to her, have completely different values than her, or just know in his coronary heart that she’s not the one. Naturally, if this isn’t addressed, his emotions will develop elsewhere.
12. He’s Trying For a Means Out
If this man is aware of he desires to go away the connection however isn’t courageous sufficient to do it outright, he could attempt sabotaging it by flirting with you.
In his thoughts, this can be a better option to finish the connection than simply instantly telling her he’s not completely satisfied and needs out.

On this case, he doesn’t actually care about getting caught. In reality, he hopes that his girlfriend will discover out in order that he can keep away from having to be the one to interrupt up.
13. There Are Outdated Emotions Between The Two Of You
Possibly you and this man have a historical past. There could have been a crush earlier than, or you could have even dated. If this was the case, he may nonetheless be drawn to you.
You might remind him of the “good outdated days” everytime you hang around, and it appears like strolling down reminiscence lane.
This fantasy of the previous could make it arduous for him to remain dedicated in his present relationship.
14. He’s On the lookout for a Thrill
Doing one thing taboo or illicit might be an thrilling expertise for some. If he’s an “adrenaline junkie,” he’ll prioritize discovering experiences that get his coronary heart racing over logical or moral approaches.
Each time he’s with you, the truth that he could get caught at any second provides an additional layer of pleasure and thrill.
15. He Doesn’t Have Relationship Boundaries
Some males don’t have a transparent sense of boundaries relating to relationships. If he’s used to getting away with flirting proper in entrance of his girlfriend, then it is sensible that he would proceed this conduct with different ladies as properly.
He could exhibit narcissist traits, resulting in him solely contemplating his personal wants and disregarding everybody else’s emotions.
Narcissistic conduct might be very damaging, so it’s necessary to create your individual boundaries round folks like this.
Is It Improper to Go Out with Him If He Has a Girlfriend?
“We love one another, however he has a girlfriend,” you could sob to your mates. It’s simple to really feel like a sufferer or somebody with out the facility to make your individual alternative whenever you’re the opposite lady.
However the accountability is as a lot yours as it’s his to make the best selections on this state of affairs.
Be certain, and there are execs and cons relying on the path you’re taking.
Listed here are some factors to think about in the event you’re enthusiastic about getting into a relationship with somebody who has a accomplice:
- You’ll by no means be capable to belief him totally: It might be tough to belief him solely as a result of he was untrue in his present relationship. Broken belief is very prevalent when a man doesn’t let you know he has a girlfriend within the first place.
- You might damage extra folks than you assume: If his girlfriend has a baby or depends on him for assist, then getting into a relationship with him may cause important ache to folks you’re not even hooked up to.
- It’s potential that he’ll cheat on you: If he’s prepared to cheat on his accomplice, then he could do the identical with you.
- There’s not a lot probability for a long-term future: How are you going to plan a life collectively when he hasn’t totally dedicated to leaving his present relationship? It’s arduous to think about a long-lasting future if one in all you is holding again.
We have to be sincere with ourselves and our emotions in these difficult conditions. As well as, we now have to think about the emotional affect this case could have on the opposite concerned events.
If we select to pursue somebody with a girlfriend, we’re basically selecting between two folks, which may carry a heavy emotional toll for everybody concerned.
What to Do If You Like Every Different, However He Has a Girlfriend
Realizing that you’ve got emotions for somebody who’s already taken is usually a tough and complicated scenario.
Although it might not appear potential, there are methods to navigate this difficult terrain and hold your integrity intact.
Respect His Relationship
It’s necessary to respect this man’s dedication to his girlfriend. Even when he’s flirting and spending time with you, it doesn’t imply it’s best to disregard his relationship.
Acknowledge that they’re in a relationship and chorus from any conduct that might result in its destruction.
Say No To Flirting
As tempting as it might be, don’t interact in flirtatious conduct with him if he has a girlfriend. Flirting will solely complicate the scenario and create emotions of guilt and dishonesty.
If he’s flirting with you, politely inform him you aren’t involved in pursuing one thing past friendship.
Don’t Lead Him On
Don’t give him false hope by main him to imagine that one thing may occur between the 2 of you.
This can solely damage his girlfriend and make it tougher for him to remain true to her. Be sincere about your emotions, even whether it is tough or uncomfortable.
Speak It Out With Him
You probably have developed emotions for this man, speaking about it with him is necessary to clear the air. Talk about your feelings and the way his relationship impacts you.
This can permit each of you to specific yourselves brazenly and truthfully, which may profit you in the long term.
Get Assist
Having emotions for somebody who has a girlfriend might be very complicated. Ensure that to talk with folks you belief and get assist out of your family members.
This can make it easier to keep grounded and make more healthy selections sooner or later. A therapist may also make it easier to parse out your emotions and information you on how you can transfer ahead.
Create Wholesome Boundaries
Creating wholesome boundaries with this man is important to guard your self and his relationship. Guarantee that your interactions with him revolve round friendship and nothing extra.
For those who do wish to transfer ahead with him, set a boundary that you would be able to’t do till he’s communicated it along with his present girlfriend and is actively leaving that relationship.
If he’s unwilling to do that, use boundaries to interrupt off any non-platonic conduct or shut down contact altogether.
Setting limits will assist make sure that the scenario doesn’t get out of hand and that you just respect everybody concerned as a lot as potential.
Ultimate Ideas
It’s not simple to navigate a scenario whenever you like somebody who has a girlfriend. However by higher understanding why he’s appearing this fashion, you may resolve probably the most compassionate method for all events concerned.
With honesty and respect, you may really feel empowered to create wholesome boundaries and guarantee nobody will get damage.
